Tuesday, July 3, 2007

Day 33

Mood: PISSED OFF


So she made plans to spend a few hours on sunday with me coz i've been sick and she wanted to see me ...we made these plans saturday night but no it came to 1.30 so i rang her to find out where she was... well she was at her brothers house packin shit into his garage..i'm told oops.. i said i have been waiting for you all day..to which she laughs and says no u havent..i said yeh i have and then she gives me the dont get shitty...well why would i... i'm just the fucken infertile pines rat who she wont come visit ..... the ones with kids she drops the earth for....well she drops me for them too... no i dont deserve her attention or time...i dont rely on her for help so therefore i can look after myself..why would i possibly need my mum in my hardest time in my life.. she has no fuckin clue...doesnt even ring up to see how i am... doesnt ask about ivf..like i'm a failure as a daughter coz i cant give her grandkids..so i dont deserve to be called or anything..hmmm... sore point.. yeh just a little...and when i say something i'm told to grow up...and stop being stupid...over it.. i give up why should i aways have to ring her and visit her

1 comment:

melsingo said...

Hey Ebz

I just thought I'd let you know that I have been reading whats happening. The $$$ signs are sure ticking over aren't they. Isn't it awful to think you have to put a price on ttc. But we do these things.
How are things with your mum??? I'm sorry to hear that she isn't being sympathetic.
Hang in there girl!